寫給"異地情侶" 如何用愛戰勝距離
With her roommates out on a date, Meng Xiangying was alone in her dormitory on Sunday afternoon. At 3 pm the 22-year-old economics major at Lanzhou University took out a few snacks and started watching her favorite TV series.
一個週日的下午，室友們都各自出去約會了，宿舍中只留下孟湘英（音譯）一個人。下午三點，這位22歲，蘭州大學經濟系學生拿出幾袋零食，開始追自己喜歡的電視劇。At the same time, Hu Yuntian at Nanjing Tech University started to watch the same video, eating the same snacks. “It’s like we’re together,” says the 22-year-old. This is the couple’s way to bridge the distance.
同一時間，南京理工大學學生胡云天（音譯）也在追同一部劇，吃着同樣的零食。22歲的他說：“就好像我們在一起一樣。”這對異地情侶用這樣的方式來縮短彼此間的距離。Long-distance relationships can be challenging, but like Meng and Hu, many college students find ways to make it work.
儘管異地戀並不輕鬆，但像孟湘英和胡云天這樣的大學生情侶們找到許多戰勝距離的方法。
He Yi, 22, is an English major at Tsinghua University. After being together with her boyfriend from Xi’an Electronic and Engineering University for three years, she concludes that their strategy is good communication. “We use WeChat and QQ every day to share our experiences and thoughts,” She says. “When we’re physically apart, it’s important to maintain an emotional bond.”
22歲的清華大學英語系學生何怡（音譯）和就讀於西安電子科技大學的男友交往了三年的時間。她總結到，他們維持戀情的策略便是保持良好的溝通。“我們每天通過微信和QQ來分享各自的經歷和想法，”她說，“分隔兩地時，維繫情感紐帶變得十分重要。”Apart from daily communication, Ma Guixia loves to keep things special. Every now and then, the 21-year-old clinical medicine major student at Soochow University surprises her boyfriend by showing up at his university unannounced. “I want to keep our spark alive,” says Ma. “Besides, when I visit him, I can experience his life, which gives us something to share and talk about.”
除了日常溝通意外，21歲的蘇州大學臨牀醫學系學生馬桂霞（音譯）還喜歡做一些特別的事。她會意外現身男友的大學，爲他送上驚喜。“我想保持這份激情，”馬桂霞說，“除此之外，我去探望他時還可以體驗他的生活，這樣我們邊有共同話題可聊了。”Meng also benefits from such surprises. “I always remember how touched I was when my boyfriend sent me a wedding dress for my birthday,” she says. When she participated in a study exchange program in Italy, the good memories helped her get through the even longer distance and time difference.
孟湘英也遭遇過這樣甜蜜的驚喜。她說：“我永遠都忘不了，收到男友送的婚紗作爲生日禮物的自己當時有多麼的感動。”當她在意大利參加交換生項目的那段時間裏，這段美好的記憶幫助她克服更遠的距離，甚至是時差。But Liu Donghua, chief psychological consultant at an Anhui-based consulting company, believes that trust is the foundation of long-distance love. “Though frequent communication and special ways to express love can keep a long-distance relationship fresh, without setting the same goals and trusting each other, lovers can hardly be faithful and understandable to each other,” she says.
而來自安徽某諮詢公司的首席心理諮詢師劉東華（音譯）則認爲信任是異地戀的基礎。她說：“通過頻繁溝通和用特別的方式來表達愛意可以保持異地戀的新鮮感。如果沒有共同目標和信任，戀人們很難忠於並理解對方。”“One of my friends fought a lot with her boyfriend and they eventually broke up because they didn’t trust each other,” says Meng. “I don’t want that to happen to us, so I talked to Hu and we agreed on our long-term plans.”
“我有一個朋友經常和男友吵架，最後因爲缺乏信任而分手，” 孟湘英說，“我不想這樣的事情發生在我們身上，所以經過一番交談，我和男友制定了的長遠計劃。”They’ve decided to pursue master’s degrees in Beijing together, which will finally bring an end to their three-year long-distance relationship and mark the beginning of a closer one.
這對情侶決定一起在北京讀研，這就意味着他們即將爲三年的異地戀畫上句點了，並開始一段更爲親密的戀情。
