12條懶人生活經驗 你有沒有被戳中
1. Brushing your teeth in the shower.
邊沖澡邊刷牙。
The holy grail of any lazy person’s morning (or afternoon depending on what time you wake up).
簡直是懶人們早上起牀的聖盃啊！（也可能是下午，取決於你起牀的時間）
2. Only wearing one color of sock.
只穿一種顏色的襪子。
Because fuck matching.
因爲襪子也要配色很煩啊！
3. Using dry shampoo.
使用乾洗發劑洗頭髮。
It’s not gross, it’s the greatest invention in hair history.
一點都不噁心！這是髮型史上最偉大的發明。
4. Owning more pairs of underwear than days of the year.
擁有的內褲數量比一年365天還多。
The fruitful consequence of abstaining from laundry as long as possible.
這樣做最大的好處是：想多久不洗衣服都可以啦～
5. Perfecting this maneuver
狂練“腳夾”能力。
You live by the motto “if you can’t reach it, you don’t need it.”
你的人生格言是：“夠不到的東西都用不着”。
6. Wearing Uggs
穿雪地靴。
Before harshly judging someone for this unfortunate fashion choice, stop to think that they might just be lazy beyond belief, just like you!
先別急着草率地判斷別人的選擇不夠時尚，他們其實就是一羣懶得令人髮指的人，就像你一樣。
7. Investing in a pair of raw denim jeans.
花錢買一條純色的斜紋粗布牛仔褲。
The directions SAY not to wash them, OK??
洗滌指南都說不用洗了，好嗎！
8. Sleeping in the shirt you wore that day.
第二天要穿那件衣服，晚上就穿着它睡覺。
Bedtime ritual: take off pants. The end.
睡前流程：脫掉長褲，搞定！
9. Rolling instead of walking.
懶得走？那就去買把帶輪子的轉椅吧！
If you have a rolly chair in your office, you know what I’m talking about.
如果你的辦公室有轉椅，你就懂我的意思了。
10. Eating over the sink so that no plates are involved.
吃東西不想洗盤子？那就在水槽邊上吃吧。
11. Eating the stickers on fruit because you’re too lazy to peel them off.
把水果上貼的標籤也一起吃了，因爲你實在懶得剝。
Get this — THEY’RE EDIBLE.
新技能get了沒：這些標籤也是可食用的哦。
12. Buying weird gadgets that let you do everything lying down.
去淘一些可以讓你躺着做事的小玩意兒。
