經典科幻文學:《宇宙盡頭的餐館》第2章1

Chapter 2
Like all Vogon ships it looked as if it had been not so much designed as congealed. The unpleasant yellow lumps and edifices which protruded from it at unsightly angles would have disfigured the looks of most ships, but in this case that was sadly impossible. Uglier things have been spotted in the skies, but not by reliable witnesses.
In fact to see anything much uglier than a Vogon ship you would have to go inside and look at a Vogon. If you are wise, however, this is precisely what you will avoid doing because the average Vogon will not think twice before doing something so pointlessly hideous to you that you will wish you had never been born – or (if you are a clearer minded thinker) that the Vogon had never been born.
In fact, the average Vogon probably wouldn’t even think once. They are simple-minded, thick-willed, slug-brained creatures, and thinking is not really something they are cut out for. Anatomical analysis of the Vogon reveals that its brain was originally a badly deformed, misplaced and dyspeptic liver. The fairest thing you can say about them, then, is that they know what they like, and what they like generally involves hurting people and, wherever possible, getting very angry.
One thing they don’t like is leaving a job unfinished – particularly this Vogon, and particularly – for various reasons – this job.

第二章
和所有沃貢飛船一樣，這艘飛船似乎沒怎麼設計就硬生生拼湊到一起。讓人不舒服的黃色腫塊和鼓包以難看的角度從船身向外凸出。放在大多數飛船上，這麼做肯定會破壞其外觀。但令人沮喪的是，這一次卻不是這樣。因爲飛船本身已經醜到了極點。比它更醜陋的東西或許曾經存在於太空中，只不過誰都沒見過。
實際上，想看到比沃貢飛船更難看的東西，你必須進入飛船內部，瞧瞧沃貢人本身。然而，如果你夠明智的話，這恰恰是你絕對應該盡力避免的事情。因爲，隨便哪個普通沃貢人，念頭稍轉，就會對你做出毫無意義但卻駭人聽聞的事來，使你簡直恨不得自己從來沒有出生過——或者希望（如果你是個頭腦比較清醒的思考者的話）那個沃貢人從來沒有出生過。
實際上，普通沃貢人可能根本不會“轉念頭”。他們屬於那種思想簡單、頭腦遲鈍但意志堅定的生物，思考不是他們的專長。對沃貢人的解剖學分析表明，他們的大腦其實原本是個嚴重畸形、長錯了位置並且有官能疾患的肝臟。硬要說說他們的好話，只能這麼說：他們知道自己喜歡什麼。可他們喜歡的東西一般說來總是和傷害別人有關，此外就是暴跳如雷，任何可能的時候，沃貢人都會暴跳如雷。
他們所憎惡的事情之一就是留下一件工作沒有完成——尤其是這一個沃貢人，並且，尤其——因爲各種各樣的原因——是這件工作。