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關於兩人英語笑話閱讀

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笑話是內容豐富並具有出乎意料結尾的幽默口頭故事。本站小編整理了關於兩人英語笑話,歡迎閱讀!

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  關於兩人英語笑話篇一

One night, a man comes home slightly drunk and his wife ( who is suspecting he’s cheating on her) questions his whereabouts…

一天深夜,一個男人稍有醉意回到家中。他的妻子問他去哪了(她有些懷疑他的話)。

Wife: "Where were you?"

妻子:“你去哪了?”

Man: "I was at this new bar called the Golden Bar. Everything is golden.”

丈夫:“我去了一個叫金色酒吧的新開張的酒吧。裏面的一切都是金的。”

Wife: "Sure you were. There' s no such place”

妻子:“你真去了嗎? 根本沒有這種地方!”

Man: "There is! They have huge golden doors, a golden floors, and even golden urinals !”

丈夫:“有!那裏有一扇大金門,金地板和金的便池!”

Wife: "Oh, I BELEIVE you 100%.”

妻子:‘好,就算我惻言你!”

So, the next day the wife looks through the phone book for this golden bar. She’s surprised when she finds a Golden Bar located across town. She decides to call up and check this out for herself…

第二天,他的妻子在電話號碼簿裏查金色酒吧的電話。使她吃驚的是金色酒吧就在他們住的小鎮的另一頭。她決定打電話過去證實一下她丈夫的話。

Wife: "Is this the Golden Bar?"

妻子:“這裏是金色酒吧嗎?”

Bartender: "Yes it is.”

酒吧服務員:“是的,金色酒吧。”

Wife: "Do you have huge golden doors? "

妻子:“你們那裏是不是有一扇金色大門?”

Bartender: "Yes we do…”

酒吧服務員:“是的,我們有......”

Wife: "Do you have golden floors?"

妻子:“你們的地板也是金色的?”

Bartender; "We have them, too…”

酒吧服務員:“是的,這也對……”

Wife: "What about golden urinals?"

妻子:“那有沒有金色便池?”

Bartender( speaking away from phone):"Hey Max,I think we have a lead on the guy that fouled your alto-sax.”

酒吧服務員在電話那頭問:“嘿,馬克斯,我認爲那天有人往你的高音薩克斯裏小便的事有線索了。”

  關於兩人英語笑話篇二

A blonde who had been unemployed for several months got a job with Public Works. She was to paint lines down the center of a rural road. The supervisor told her that she was on probation and that she must stay at or above the set average of 2 miles per day to remain employed. The blonde agreed to the conditions and started right away.

一個已經幾個月沒有工作的金髮女郎,找到了一份公共工程建設的工作。她要給一條鄉村公路的中央畫線。監工告訴她,在試用期她必須保證每天刷兩英里或兩英里以上才能保住工作。這個金髮女郎同意馬上開始工作。

The supervisor checked up at the end of the day and found that she had completed four miles on her first day, double the average! "Great ,”he told her, "I think you are really going to work out.”The next day,however, he was disappointed to find that the blonde only did two miles. The supervisor thought,"She is still above the average. I should not discourage her. I'd better keep silence first.” In the third day, the blonde only did one mile and the boss thought, "I need to talk to her before this gets any worse.”

監工當天檢查時發現她第一天完成了四英里,是平均量的兩倍!“很好!”監工告訴她,“我想你會幹得很出色。”但是第二天,他失望地發現女郎只完成了兩英里。監工想:“她還在平均量以上,我還不能打擊她,我先要保持沉默。”第三天,金髮女郎只刷了一英里,老闆想:“在她幹得更差之前我得跟她談談。”

The boss talked to the new employee and said, "You were doing so great. The first day you did four miles, the second day two miles, but yesterday you only did one mile. Is there a problem? What’s keeping you from meeting the two-mile minimum?" The blonde replied, "Well, each day I keep getting farther and farther away from the paint bucket.”

老闆對這個新僱員說:“第一天你幹得那麼好,刷了四英里,第二天兩英里,但昨天你只刷了一英里。有什麼問題嗎?什麼讓你連兩英里的限度也到不了?”女郎回答:“因爲我離油漆桶一天比一天遠。”

  關於兩人英語笑話篇三

A judge was instructing the jury that a witness was not necessarily to be regarded as untruthful because he changed his statement after he gave it to the police."For example," he said, "when I entered my chambers today,I was positive that I had my gold watch in my pocket. But then I remembered that I left it on my desk in my bedroom."

一個法官正告知陪審團,不必因爲一個證人改變了他已經交給警察的證詞就認爲他不可信。“比方說,”他說,“當今天我走進我的辦公室的時候,我以爲我的金錶

在我的口袋裏。但隨後我想起來我把它放在我臥室的書桌上了。”

When the judge returned home that evening, his wife asked him,"Why so much urgency for your watch? Isn’t sending three men to pick it up for you a bit extreme?"

當法官那天晚上回到家時,他妻子問他:“爲什麼那麼着急要你的表?還派三個人取你的表,是不是有一點過分了?”

"What?” said the judge, "I didn't send anyone for my watch, let alone three people. What did you do?"

“什麼?”法官說,“我沒派人來取表,更不用說三個人。你都幹了什麼?”

"I gave it to the first man,” said the wife, "he knew exactly where it was."

“我把手錶給了第一個人,”妻子說,“因爲他很清楚那表放在什麼地方。”


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