關於簡短爆笑英文笑話大全

笑話作爲民間俗文學的一種重要體裁,具有深厚的民族文化內涵。本文是關於簡短爆笑英文笑話，希望對大家有幫助!

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　　關於簡短爆笑英文笑話：Alcohol At Work

Here are some pretty solid reasons why alcohol should be served at work...

It's an incentive to show up.

It leads to more honest communications.

It reduces complaints about low pay.

Employees tell management what they think, not what management wants to hear.

It encourages car pooling.

Increase job satisfaction because if you have a bad job, you don't care.

It eliminates vacations because people would rather come to work.

It makes fellow employees look better.

It makes the cafeteria food taste better.

Bosses are more likely to hand out raises when they are wasted.

Salary negotiations are a lot more profitable.

Employees work later since there's no longer a need to relax at the bar.

It makes everyone more open with their ideas.

Eliminates the need for employees to get drunk on their lunch break.

Increases the chance of seeing your boss naked.

Employees no longer need coffee to sober up.

Sitting "bare ass" on the copy machine will no longer be seen as "gross."

Not having to worry about your wife being mad when you come home wasted - its your job!

Any sick days taken would be completely genuine.

you can take longer and more frequent bathroom breaks.

　　關於簡短爆笑英文笑話：Hide The Duke

A boy was meeting his girlfriend's parents for the first time for dinner. After dinner, his girlfriend and her mother left the room to do the dishes, leaving him with the father and the dog Duke, who was sitting underneath the boy's chair. Unfortunately, it was a large dinner and he really had to fart. He stealthily let out a quiet, but audible, fart.

"Duke!" the dad yelled.

"This is great!" the boy thought. "He thinks the dog is farting!" So he let out another one.

"Duke!" the father barked. The boy thought he was homefree so he let everything out at once in a really loud and smelly fart.

"Duke! Get out of there before the boy sh*ts on you!"

　　關於簡短爆笑英文笑話：Ladies Night Club

The other day, my friends and I went to this Ladies Night Club. One of the girls wanted to impress us, so she pulled out a $10 bill. The dancer came over to us, and my friend licked the $10 and stuck it on his butt.

Not to be outdone, my other friend pulled out a $50 bill. She called the guy back over, licked the $50 bill and stuck it on his other butt cheek.

Now the attention was focused on me. What could I do to top that?

I got out my wallet and thought for a minute. Then the banker in me took over. I got my ATM card... Swiped it down his CRACK... Grabbed the 60 Bucks... And went Home!!!

　　關於簡短爆笑英文笑話：Neighbourhood Report

A couple never could get good sex because their boy always used to either knock the room's door where they're having sex or suddenly come in. So the next father told his child to go out in the balcony and see the what all was happening in the neighbourhood, so that the guy could have sex. So the little kid went outside in the balcony and started reporting all the happenings in the neighbourhood. He started, "Drew's doing his barbie dance. The Jacksons are having their barbeque in the backyard. Paula is cleaning her pink Porche. The Svensons are having good sex." Shocked by this guy shouted back to his boy.."how the hell did you know that?" and the kid replied .." 'coz their kid too is observing the neighbourhooh from the balcony.

　　關於簡短爆笑英文笑話： 50-50 Partner

A rich businessman had a meeting with his new son-in-law.

"Welcome to the family," said the man. "I'm so happy, I'm making you a 50-50 partner in my business. All you have to do is go to the factory every day and learn the operations."

The son-in-law interrupted. "Oh, um, I actually hate factories. Can't stand the noise."

The father-in-law said, "Well, then you'll work in the office and take charge of some of the operations."

"I hate office work, too" said the son-on-law. "I can't stand being stuck behind a desk all day."

"Wait a minute," said the father-in-law. "I just made you half-owner of a moneymaking organization, but you don't like factories and won't work in a office. What am I going to do with you?"

"Easy," said the young man. "Buy me out."

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