英文幽默笑話故事大全
笑話在文章中就像川菜的麻辣或酸味,讓人開胃。刺激食慾,增添了雜文銳利的思想性和獨立的邏輯力量。下面是本站小編帶來的英文幽默笑話故事，歡迎閱讀!
guardian angle守護天使
A man was walking in the street when he heard a voice:
有一名男子正走在街上的時候聽到一個聲音：
"Stop!Stand still!If you.take one more step,a brick will fall down on your head and kill you."
“停!站住不要動瞅口果你再走一步，就會有一個磚塊掉到你的頭上砸死你。”
The man stopped and a big brick fell right in front of him.
這名男子停住了，一個大磚塊就掉在他的面前。
The man was astonished .
這名男子非常驚訝。
He went on,and after a while he was going to cross the road.
他繼續向前走：不久後，他要穿越馬路。
Once again the voice shouted;
那個聲音再次叫說：
Stop!Stand still!If you take one more step a car will over you and you will die."
“停!站住不要動，如果你再走一步，就會有一輛汽車輾過你，你就會死掉。”
The man did as he was instructed,
這名男子因爲曾被指示過，所以就照着做，
just as a car came careening around the corner,barely missing him.
此時正好有一輛汽車左搖右晃地衝過轉角處，差一點撞上他。
"Where are you? " the man asked,"Who are you? "
這名男子問說：“你在哪裏?你是誰?”
"I am your guardian angle," the voice answered.
這個聲音回答說：“我是你的守護天使。…”
"Oh yeah?" the man asked."And where the hell were you when I got married?"
這名男子問說：“喔，是嗎?那我結婚的時候：你死到哪裏去了?”
英文幽默笑話故事篇二Why me lord主啊爲什麼是我
A man was wandering around in a field ,
有名男子在田野裏徘徊
thinking about how good his wife had been to him and how fortunate he was to have her,
心裏想着他的老婆對他有多麼好，他多麼幸運擁有她。
He asked God,"Why did you make her so kind hearted?"
他問上帝：“你爲什麼要把她造得這麼心地善良?”
The Lord responded,"So you could love her ,my son."
主響應說：“我兒 呀，這樣你就會愛她呀。”
"Why did you make her so good looking?"
“你爲什麼要把她造得這麼貌美呢?”
"So you could love her,my son ."
“我兒呀，這樣你就會愛她呀。”
"Why did you make her such a good cook?"
“你爲什麼要把她造成一個很會做飯菜的人呢?”
"So you could love her,my son."
“我兒呀，這樣你就會愛她呀。”
The man thought about this.
這名男子想了一下這件事。
Then he said ," I don't mean to seem ungrateful or anything,but,why did you make her so stupid? "
然後他說:“我並不是有意好像我不知好歹，或是什麼的,可是，你爲什麼把她造得這麼笨?”
"So she could love you,my son."
“ 我兒呀，這樣她就會愛你呀。”
英文幽默笑話故事篇三Dying in peace安然死亡
Helen was on her deathbed ,
海倫躺在她臨終的病牀上奄奄一息。
with her husband Jack at her side.
她的丈夫陪在她的身旁。
He held her cold hand and tears silently streamed down his face.
他握着她冰冷的手，淚水靜靜地從他的臉上流下來。
Her pale lip moved. "Jack," she said,"
她蒼白的嘴脣顫動着。她說：“傑克，”
Hush," he quickly interrupted, "Don't talk."
他很快就打斷說：“噓，不要說話。”
But she insisted,"Jack,"she said in her tired voice.
但是她堅持要說。她以疲憊的聲音說：
"I have to talk.I must confess.”
“傑克，我一定要說。我必須向你坦白。”
"There is nothing to confess,"said the weeping Jack.
滿臉淚水的傑克說：“沒什麼好坦白的。
"It's all ything's all right."
沒關係。一切都沒事。”
"No,No!I must die in peace.I must confess,Jake ,that I have been unfaithful to you."
“不，不，我必須死得安心。我一定要坦白我對你不忠;紅杏出牆。”
Jack stroked her hand .
傑克撫摸着她的手。
"Now ,Helen,don't be concerned.I know all about it," he sobbed.
他啜泣着說：“海倫 ，現在你不要擔心了。我全部都知道了。
"Why else would I poison you ?"
不然我爲什幺要毒死你呀?"
