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黴黴的行蹤撲朔迷離

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There's Just No Way Taylor Swift Is in This Giant t?

全球的狗仔隊都找不到黴黴?因爲她在行李箱裏……

Update, 4:30PM: Splash has changed the caption on this suite of photos. It now reads: "Taylor Swift's security guards are seen moving a huge case into the trunk of an awaiting SUV."

Splash網站於今天下午4點30分將照片下的文字說明更改爲“有人看到泰勒·斯威夫特的保安們正在將一個巨大的箱子擡向一輛SUV。”

Original post: Are you ready for today's instalment of Please Let It Be True News? You couldn't possibly be. It's really something. But here it is anyway: Irish radio station Spin 1038 noticed that photo service Splash has labeled several photos with intriguing captions that claim Taylor Swift is inside this giant black suitcase:

報道原文:準備好收看今天的“這是真的嗎?”你一定準備好了。愛爾蘭廣播之聲 Spin 1038注意到圖片網站Splash登出了幾張照片。並在下面附上了一系列有意思的文字,宣稱泰勒斯威夫特藏在了圖中大黑箱子裏。

'Hello, it's me / Not Adele / It's Taylor Swift in this box'

‘大家好,是我/不是阿黛勒/箱子裏是泰勒斯威夫特哦’

Splash has titled the suite of photographs: "Is Taylor Swift being transported in a huge suitcase from her Tribeca apartment??" That double question mark doesn't really reflect my emotional state about this whole situation—I'd say I'm more at the 40,000-question mark level.

之前,Splash展示了一組照片,並附上了如下文字:“泰勒·斯威夫特離開了其在翠貝卡的公寓,藏在了行李箱裏??”結尾的兩個問號並不能真實地反映我對整個事件看法——我心裏可是有上千個問號。

But no matter how much I want it to be true, this tale is just totally ridiculous. The caption has to be some kind of mistake, right? Even though celebrities do sometimes have to resort to unusual measures so they can get around without being detected by paparazzi ,this particular story has a flavor of the unreal.

無論我有多希望這條消息是真的,它都只是一個噱頭。儘管名人們有時不得不採取一些非常手段來避開狗仔隊,這件事仍舊是一件不可能事件。

Even though the intrepid author of this caption does not seem to have heard of spell check or a dictionary, I must applaud them. This rumor is utterly, captivatingly bonkers, yet it does recall one very strange and hilarious celebrity confession: Remember when Adele said she was taken to the stage in some kind of big suitcase thing? Everyone knows the best lies are a little related to the truth.

儘管這個大膽的作者可能從沒聽說過拼寫檢查或查字典這回事,我仍舊要爲他鼓掌。雖然這完全是一條愚蠢透頂的謠言,卻讓我們想起了一個名人說過的一件事:阿黛爾透露她曾經把自己裝在一個又悶又溼的箱子裏從後臺移動到舞臺上。大家都知道,虛假中夾雜着真實,這纔是最佳的謊言。

黴黴的行蹤撲朔迷離

Obviously, there's no way for the regular person to visually verify that it really is Swift in there. Sure, maybe there's a person inside, but for all we know, according to the caption , it could just be a tailor whose name is Swift, who prefers boxes to the subway (don't we all). Or this suitcase could be empty. There might be 50 meatball sandwiches in it. We just don't know.

顯然,我們普通人並不能用肉眼判斷泰勒是否真的在箱子裏。的確,箱子裏可能真有一個人,但據我們所知,根據這張圖的文字說明,這個人可能只是一個叫做斯威夫特的裁縫,喜歡將自己打包去地鐵站。或者那箱子根本就是空的。也或許裏面裝了50個肉丸三明治。

Anyway, even as a workplace drama, this group of photographs is really something. Just look how hard these guys are working.

總之,儘管這是一出辦公室鬧劇,照片本身卻是真實的。看看這些工人是多麼努力地在上班。

'Good job, boys.'

‘幹得好,夥計。’

This guy is all of us:

這個人和我們一樣是普通人:

Same.

同上。

And so is this guy:

這個人也是:

Me at work.

我在工作。

At least we'll always have them.

他們就是我們身邊的人。