經典科幻文學:《 基本上無害 Mostly Harmless》 第9章5

He frowned again at the brochure, as if to be certain that he hadn’t misread it and stupidly turned up on the wrong planet or something. The brochure said ‘The friendly local inhabitants will be glad to share with you the knowledge and wisdom of the ancients. Peer with them into the swirling mysteries of past and future time!’ There were some coupons as well, but Arthur had been far too embarrassed actually to cut them out or try to present them to anybody.

他又指着旅遊手冊皺起眉頭，好像想確定自己確實沒有看錯，也沒有傻乎乎地走錯了星球之類。手冊上說：“友善的當地居民會很樂意與你分享古人的知識與智慧。來同他們一道窺視過去，未來那炫目的奧祕吧！”上頭還附送了幾張優惠券，可阿瑟臉皮太薄，沒有當真把它們剪下來或者亮給人家看。

‘Advice, eh,’ said the old woman again. ‘Just sort of general advice, you say. On what? What to do with your life, that sort of thing?’

“建議，呃。”老婦人又說，“比較概括的那種，你說。關於什麼的？今後的日子該怎麼過，那之類的？”

‘Yes,’ said Arthur. ‘That sort of thing. Bit of a problem I sometimes find if I’m being perfectly honest.’ He was trying desperately, with tiny darting movements, to stay upwind of her. She surprised him by suddenly turning sharply away from him and heading off towards her cave.

“沒錯。”阿瑟說，“那之類的，老實說，有時候我覺得這是個問題。”他陷入了有些絕望的境地，不斷地用幅度小，速度快的動作試圖保持住上風向的位置。對方突然一個轉身朝自己的洞走過去，阿瑟着實吃了一驚。

‘You’ll have to help me with the photocopier, then,’ she said.

“那麼你得搭把手，影印機。”她說。

‘What?’ said Arthur.

“什麼？”阿瑟問。

‘The photocopier,’ she repeated, patiently. ‘You’ll have to help me drag it out. It’s solar-powered. I have to keep it in the cave, though, so the birds don’t shit on it.’

“影印機。”她耐心地解釋着，“你得幫我把它拽出來。它是太陽能的。不過我得把它放在洞裏，免得鳥在上面拉屎。”

‘I see,’ said Arthur.

“哦。”阿瑟說。

‘I’d take a few deep breaths if I were you,’ muttered the old woman, as she stomped into the gloom of the cave mouth.

“如果我是你就做幾下深呼吸。”老婦人一面嘟囔，一面咚咚咚地走進了黑黝黝的洞裏。