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關於萬聖節的英文笑話

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冷笑話是一種新興的語言現象,也是一種出現在我們身邊的不可忽視的新的語言現象。冷笑話不同於一般笑話,它以其獨特的制笑機制,能瞬間創造出一種特殊的氛圍。小編精心收集了關於萬聖節的英文笑話,供大家欣賞學習!

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  關於萬聖節的英文笑話篇1

The Cemetery Shortcut

爲抄近路走墓地

Two men were walking home after a Halloween party and decided to take a shortcut through the cemetery just for laughs.

萬聖節派對過後,兩男人圖個樂呵,打算抄近路穿過墓地回家。

Right in the middle of the cemetery they were startled by a tap-tap-tapping noise coming from the misty shadows.

走到墓地中央時,他們被從迷霧中傳來的“答、答、答”聲驚嚇到了。

Trembling with fear, they found an old man with a hammer and chisel, chipping away at one of the headstones.

正當兩人害怕得渾身顫抖時,他們看到是個老頭拿着鐵錘和鑿子,在一塊墓石上鑿着什麼。

"Holy cow, Mister," one of them said after catching his breath, "You scared us half to death -- we thought you were a ghost! What are you doing working here so late at night?"

“哇塞,先生,”其中一人喘了口氣說,“你把我們嚇得半死啊,我們還以爲遇上鬼了呢!那麼晚了你在這裏做什麼?”

"Those fools!" the old man grumbled. "They misspelled my name!"

“那幫白癡!”老頭抱怨道,“他們把我名字拼錯啦!”

  關於萬聖節的英文笑話篇2

Why did the vampire(吸血鬼) go to the orthodontist(正牙醫生)?To improve his bite...

What do you get when you cross a vampire and a snowman?Frostbite...

Why do witches use brooms to fly on?Because vacuum cleaners(真空吸塵器) are too heavy...

How do witches keep their hair in place while flying?With scare spray...

Why don't skeletons ever go out on the town?Because they don't have any body to go out with...

What did one ghost say to the other ghost?"Do you believe in people?"

What do you call someone who puts poison in a person's corn flakes?A cereal killer...

Why do mummies have trouble keeping friends?They're so wrapped up in ped up in

What kind of streets do zombies(蛇神) like the best?Dead ends...

What does the papa ghost say to his family when driving?Fasten your sheet belts...

What is a vampire's favorite mode of transportation?A blood vessel...

What is a ghost's favorite mode of transportation?A scareplane...

What type of dog do vampire's like the best?Bloodhounds...

What does a vampire never order at a restaurant?A stake sandwich...

What is a skeleton's favorite musical instrument?A trombone(長號)...

What do birds give out on Halloween night?Tweets(小鳥啼叫)...

Why do vampires need mouthwash?They have bat breath...

What's a vampire's favorite fast food?A guy with very high blood pressure...

  看了“關於萬聖節的英文笑話”後,本站小編分享英語笑話“乞討”!

"There was a blind beggar wearing sunglasses and asking for money. A drunk man walked by, thinking the beggar was pitiful, threw him a hundred r walking a few steps, the drunkard turned around to see the blind man holding the money up to the sunlight to check if it was genuine. The drunk man, feeling cheated, ran back and snatched the money back, “You’re gonna die! How dare you cheat me…”The blind man, not wanting to feel like a cheater, retorted, “Hey man, I’m sorry, I’m just here to replace my friend who really is blind. He went to the bathroom, and should be right back… Actually… I’m mute.”“Oh, oh, in that case...” whereupon the drunk threw the money back and stumbled away.

在路邊一個盲人乞丐戴着墨鏡在街上行乞。一個醉漢走過來,覺得他可憐,就扔了一百元給他。走了一段路,醉漢一回頭,恰好看見那個盲人正對着太陽分辨那張百元大抄的真假。醉漢過來一把奪回錢道:“你不想活了,竟敢騙老子!” 盲人乞丐一臉委屈說:“大哥,真對不起啊,我是替一個朋友"在這看一下,他是個瞎子,去上廁所了,其實我是個啞巴。”“哦,是這樣子啊!”於是醉漢扔下錢,又搖搖晃晃地走了……


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