託福寫作—你的例子舉好了嗎
相信很多烤鴨們在託福獨立寫作中，都喜歡舉例子，具體怎麼樣使用才能拿高分……下面小編給大家帶來託福寫作—你的例子舉好了嗎?來學習一下!
託福寫作—你的例子舉好了嗎?
從小，語文老師都會教導我們，例子可以使我們想要表達的觀點或者要闡述的概念更加生動形象，以使得觀點更加地具有說服力。而且針對託福寫作來講，ETS考官比較青睞例證比較好的文章。一般來講，在託福的獨立寫作當中，我們常用的例子包括兩種，第一種就是假設一個一般化的例子，通過假設一個場景來說明問題，而這種例子的寫法一般比較適合比較大的一些話題，比如“Do you agree or disagreewith the following statement? Landneeds to be used to meet human need rather than to protect endangered animals.”。另一種例子是去描述特別具體的某個人或者某一件事情，這種例子一般比較適合與我們的生活，工作和學習緊密相關的話題。比如“Do you agree or disagreewith the following statement ? Keeping old friends is more important thanmaking new friends.”;今天我們就來展示怎樣把這兩種例子寫好。
一、假設性的例子
假設性的例子有兩點好處。其一就是別人不會懷疑我們寫的這個例子的真實性，二就是假設性的例子其實是analytic example，這種伴隨着分析的例子其實要更符合託福獨立寫作的風格，更能夠體現一個學生的分析能力與水平，畢竟議論文的特點就是分析和證明。
Topic：Do you agree or disagree with the followingstatement? Land needs to be used to meet human need rather than to protectendangered animals.
Position：Protect endangered animals
Reason:Anotherimportant reason to protect endangered animals is that the delicate ecologicalbalance of an area might be irreparably harmed by their extinction.
Exemplification:For example,if humans chop down forests and use the land to grow corn, they mightsimultaneously destroy the habitats of a kind of bird that eats locusts. Thenext year because the locust population can grow unchecked, locusts mightdestroy the entire nearby corn crop. Not only do the birds lose their homes,but humans are also harmed. The ecological balance of many natural habitats isstill not well understood and humans interfere in it at their peril.
通過這一段，大家可以看到假設性的例子的威力。整段文章不長，例子也不多，但是卻非常有效地證明了段首的觀點即保護生態平衡的重要性。所以，文章不一定要寫很多，但是一定要寫好，永遠不要忘了，獨立寫作的靈魂和核心就是去證明一個觀點的合理性和說服力，所以你用的手段很重要。
二、具體的例子
Topic: Do youagree or disagree with the following statement? The students in universityshould not do any part-time jobs.
Position: Disagree
Reason:Doing part-time jobs can intensify our social ability.
Exemplification:Take myselffor example. When I was a fresh man，I found it really hard to get along with people around me . Then Iwas advised to take a job as a waiter in the restaurant during which I had chancesto communicate with different customers, making them satisfied with my “smile” service. After a year, I myself can realize that I have becomemore outgoing and understanding.
寫一個很具體例子的時候同學們要注意幾個問題：
1、不要寫得特別長，寫太多就變成了記敘文，而我們的獨立寫作是議論文體;
2、這種例子一定要和說理分析性的內容結合在一起才能夠支撐起來一個主體段。
託福獨立寫作高分小技巧：Rhetorical Questions
如果說參加托福考試時在綜合寫作中還可以適當使用“模板”的話，那麼獨立寫作裏“模板”的使用往往會被並標以“pre-prepared”，因此考生想通過這種“捷徑”提高得分的結果不會特別理想。獨立寫作提高得分的關鍵還是“實力說話”。
儘管“模板”效果有限，但短期提高得分的技巧還是很多，如活用“萬能理由”和巧用“論證方法”等。本文主要介紹在獨立寫作中很多考生沒有注意的一個加分“小”技巧—rhetorical question的使用。
在託福寫作實戰中，rhetorical question的使用能夠起到很好的加分作用。爲了說明rhetorical question的加分作用，請看託福Official Guide評卷人對一篇題爲Dishonesty Kills Reliability的滿分作文的點評。下面是點評中關於language的comment：
The writer's language is fluent, accurate, and varied enough to effectively support the progression and connection of ideas. There is a variety of sentence structures, including rhetorical questions.
評卷人把rhetorical questions看做加分點!
從上面的點評中，我們可以清楚的得出這個結論——至少評卷人把上述段落中的反問句視作一種“句型變化”而加以肯定和褒揚。
那麼，何謂rhetorical question?Rhetorical question會不會很難?
我們先來看在託福Official Guide裏備受評卷人讚譽的rhetorical question實例。在原文第四段中，爲了說明honesty的重要性作者是這樣寫的：
In any relationship of mine, I would wish that first of all, the person I'm dealing with is though s/he thinks that s/he did something wrong that I wouldn't like,s/he'd better tell me the truth and not lie about it. Later on if I find out about a lie or hear the truth from someone else, that'd be much more unpleasant. In that case how can I ever believe or trust that person again?How can I ever believe that this person has enough confidence in me to forgive him/her and carry on with the relationship from there.……
提問而不需對方回答，提問只是爲了表明並強調作者的立場。這不就是漢語中的“反問”嗎?維基百科對反問句的定義是：
A rhetorical question is a figure of speech in the form of a question thatis asked to make a point rather than to elicit an answer. Though a rhetorical question does not require a direct answer, in many cases it may beintended to start a discussion or at least draw an acknowledgement that thelistener understands the intended message.
還有學者對反問的定義更加清楚：
A rhetorical question is asked just for effect or to lay emphasison some point discussed when no real answer is expected.
那麼，rhetorical question爲什麼能夠收到評卷人的讚譽而得到加分?這就要從託福作文的評分標準說起了。託福Official Guide裏面對於高分作文的要求(Scoring Rubic)描述如下：
_ffectively addresses the topicand task
_s well organized and well developed, appropriate explanations, exemplifications, and / or details
_isplay Unity, progression, and coherence
_isplay consistent use of language,demonstrating syntactic variety, appropriate word choice, and idiomaticity
從上面的評分標準可以清楚看出，rhetorical question能夠幫助我們滿足實現評分標準第四條中的“demonstrating syntactic variety”。這也正是官方指南中評卷人的點評。
其實，除了體現“句型變化”，合理使用rhetorical question還能幫助我們滿足評分標準第一條的要求“effectively addresses the topic and task”。事實上，rhetorical question不僅能夠有效的迴應主題，還能強調作者的觀點從而獲得讀者的認同。rhetorical question的這種強調作用最著名的範例可能算是雪萊《西風頌》Ode to the West Wind的結尾了：
“O Wind,If Winter comes,can Spring be far behind?”
另外，問句，尤其是設問的合理使用還能起到很好的銜接作用，也就是評分標準的第三條“Display Unity, progression, and coherence”。因此，有學者把rhetorical question的篇章作用總結如下：
? Emphasize a point
? Persuade powerfully
? Influence subtly
? Provoke thinking
? Help smooth transition
限於篇幅，對這些作用就不一一舉例了。順便說一下，rhetorical question後面的標點並不一定總是question mark，有時也可以是句號或感嘆號。
下面，本文作者提供一篇自己寫的樣文，請大家分析問句在開頭、中間和結尾段中的使用。
Some people prefer to ask others for help; others prefer to solve the problem with their own knowledge. Which is your choice?
Such is human nature that everyone longs for happiness in our life. Unfortunately, on the path to pursue happiness, we are likely to face various problems. How to solve them? Should we rely on ourselves to remove the obstacle or turn toothers for a cure?From my perspective, it is more reasonable to ask others for help.
Admittedly, always hinging on others to solve problems might be irrational in some cases. For example, if you ask an acquaintance with whom you haven’t a close tie to lend you a hand, he might be reluctant, because most of us have our own care and concern. Besides,some people are unwilling to shoulder the responsibility for the advice they offer. It’s not a rare case when we ask our friend for advice on what major to choose only to get a reply: “Well, it’s really hard to say. Who knows what your real interest is? Who knows what major will be popular when you graduate?”
In spite of the points mentioned above, I still cling to the idea that we should depend on others for the following reasons.
First of all, asking others for help can save us much valuable time, time that we can use for other purposes. As is known to all, most people in contemporary society are always burdened with endless stress and strain. To be admitted to prestigious universities, schoolchildren have to burn midnight oil to out do their peers in exams; likewise,university students can do nothing but to work against the clock to lend themselves an edge over others in the talent market so that they can land adecent job. Given the quickening pace of life, how can we expect us to remove all the obstacles only by ourselves?
In addition, turning to others for help is an efficient way for us to enlarge our circle of friends. It is not a rare case that friendship might be formed after we ask others for help. Take myself as an example. After helping me find a cure for my personal health problem, one of my colleagues has become my best friend. Now, when in trouble,he also asks for my advice. No wonder some even state that it is an efficient way to find friends by “bothering” others for their ds surprising?It is a discovery revealed inrecent research conducted by a group of leading experts.
Most importantly, it is the only choice to call for help when the solution to a problem requires expertise. Itis known to all that today’s society differs greatly from what it was before. Even a century ago, most folks could be self-sufficient: they grew grain on their own land and wove cloth on their own looms, which seems unimaginable in modern society. Unlike the “good old days”, modern society is a huge complex machine in which each person can serve only as a tiny example, City dwellers depend on farmers for grain while farmers rely on factory workers for industrial products; in the same way, factory workers may temporarily drown our worries in soap operas shown on the screen while film-makers cannot have a film produced, however talented they might be, without the talents of play wrights,directors, photographers, actors or actresses.
Why not ask others for solution when necessary?Good or bad, this might be the best choice left to us.
託福範文分析：要不要進行太空探索
Some people think governments should spend as much money as possible exploring outer space (for example, traveling to the Moon and other planets). Other people disagree ant think governments should spend this money for our basic needs on Earth. Which of these two opinions do you agree with? Use specific reasons and details to support your answer.
Even people born after 1968 can easily name the first man to land on the moon; we have all seen the black and white footage of Neil Armstrong in a space suit taking slow, bounding steps to plant an American flag on the moon’s surface. Now, forty years later, some might suggest that governments should continue exploring outer space, and should even devote a healthy amount of money from their budgets to this end. However, the needs of our world have changed, and we must prioritize our spending accordingly and allocate our financial resources to helping the Earth itself.
When we consider the exploration of outer space that had its heyday in the 1950’s and 1960’s, we must also consider the political factors that were present here on Earth. During the Cold War, countries like the United States and the Soviet Union were interested in displaying their intellectual, scientific and financial resources, and outer space became the arena in which this took place. The ‘‘Space Race’’ culminated in 1968 when the United States landed the first astronauts on the moon. Space exploration was of the extreme interest to ordinary citizens, but was connected to themes of national strength and patriotism.
Now, as we consider whether to continue the exploration of outer space, our world is faced with a different set of circumstances. Governments are less preoccupied with their standing in the world, and more interested in the well-being of those who live in it. The greatest threat to our well-being is our damaged environment, and this is a concern of the entire world. For example, pollution caused by factories in South America might contribute to rising water levels in Bangladesh. Space exploration would require a great outlay of money on equipment, personnel and fuel; instead we must allot our financial resources toward cooperating with other countries to improve the environment and help make life more bearable for our fellow citizens on earth.
In summary, those who were alive during the Age of Exploration of the 1950’s and 1960’s can remember the excitement of that era; the scientific findings of those missions to outer space have provided precious insights into the universe beyond Earth. However, one of the goals of governments pursuing space exploration was to provide a show of strength for their countries. Now, the best way a government can show its strength is to show that it cares for its fellow citizens around the world.
託福寫作範文：新建大學
The government has announced that it plans to build a new university. Some people think that your community would be a good place to locate the university. Compare the advantages and disadvantages of establishing a new university in your community. Use specific details in your discussion.
I was fortunate enough to grow up in a small town where the state university is located, and my family’s life was richer as a result of having this university in our midst. Living in a “college town” can have its disadvantages, but I would readily advocate having a new university established in my community.
One of the primary advantages of having a university situated in a community is the economic boost it would enjoy. First and foremost, the community could look forward to the creation of steady jobs, including chefs to cook in the dining room, librarians to catalog books, and gardeners to landscape the grounds. Local restaurants, movie theaters and bookstores would benefit from the spending power of young college students, and new cafes and bars might even spring up.
However, a college town finds itself enriched not just financially but in other, less tangible ways. University life consists not just of academic but of extracurricular pursuits. Professors regularly give lectures on their fields of expertise, from Dostoevsky and Russian literature to American Civil War history, and these lectures are usually open to the public, as are concerts, poetry readings and plays. Especially in a small town, international students provide glimpses into other cultures that would otherwise not be so readily available. In the town where I grew up, a large number of doctoral students came from India with their families. The daughter of one such family eventually became my best friend; her family brought me to local Indian cultural events and I grew to love the culture and now consider Indian food to be practically my native cuisine.
It would be inaccurate, though, to portray a college town as a utopia. It’s an unavoidable fact that some undergraduates consider partying to be central to the college experience, and when such students live off campus in apartments, their lifestyles are likely to cause tension among their neighbors. Longtime residents who relish their communities as peaceful, family-oriented places to live are naturally disturbed when a group of students rent the house next door and create an atmosphere of drinking, parties and loud music at odd hours. There is no easy solution, but communication between the university administration and the community is an essential part of the planning process before the university is established.
When a university is established, it becomes inextricably connected to the community where it is located. Alumni who return, years later, for reunions might have some of their fondest memories away from campus, for example in the coffee shop where they spent hours studying, or at the ice cream shop that was a Friday night destination. Planning and discussion between the administration and the community will always be necessary to reduce conflict, but if given the opportunity to welcome a new university to my community, I would be more than enthusiastic about the prospect.
Eg: Four centuries ago, Christopher Columbus, one of the Italian mariners whom the decline of their own republics had put at the service of the world and of adventure, seeking for Spain a westward passage to the Indies as setoff against the achievements of Portuguese discoverers, lighted on America.
Eg: With these hopes and in this belief I would urge you, laying aside all hindrance, thrusting away all private aims, to devote yourselves unswervingly and unflinchingly to the vigorous and successful prosecution of this war.
