和妹子約會時,給你的十大建議(2)

oyment Status

7.就業狀況

The notion of living on love truly proves to be frivolity if either one of you are unemployed or underemployed. While it may seem like a non-issue at first, you should verify whether or not the girl you want to date is employed. Many relationships start out with the guy paying for the movie tickets, dinner, taxi fare, and other expenses. However, as the relationship progresses, this continued financial burden can be too much for any man to keep up without running his bank account dry. When you want to know that your romance can survive in every way, particularly financially, you should find out if the girl you like has a job.

如果你們中的任何一個處於失業或者待業狀態，那麼只靠愛爲生就太天真了。雖然剛開始這似乎沒什麼大不了，你也應該弄清你想約會的女孩是否有工作。許多關係的確立都是由一個人支付電影票，餐費，出租車費還有其他經費開始的。然而，隨着關係的進展，這持續的財政負擔對於任何人來說，大得足以榨乾他的存款。當你想知道這段戀情能否經得住考驗，尤其是財政問題，你都應該查明你喜歡的女孩是否有工作。

At first glance, you may think it tacky to consider a girl undatable because she does not have a job. However, statistics show that couples fight over money more often than you would think. In fact, fights about money prove to be the breaking point in many partnerships that would otherwise thrive if both parties had enough money coming in to meet their needs and wants.

乍一看，因爲一個女孩沒有工作就不值得約會的觀點難免有點俗。然而，統計數據顯示，夫妻因錢吵架的次數比你想象的要多。事實上，因爲錢而導致勞燕分飛的例子，比比皆是。但是如果雙方有足夠的錢來滿足他們的需要和慾望，他們的關係則會很好。

If she is unemployed right now, but going to college, you can at least take hope in the fact that she is training for a future career. However, if she continues to be jobless after graduating or if she drops out of college and fails to get a job, you would do well to take that as a sign that the financial burden in your relationship will fall on you. If this burden is something you would rather not handle at this time, you may do well to avoid asking her out at all.

如果她現在沒有就業，但是準備上大學，事實上，你至少可以期冀她是在爲未來的事業做準備。然而，如果畢業之後她任然沒有工作，或者輟學，找不到一份工作，你就要做好在這段感情中，財政負擔落到你的肩上的準備。如果這時候你不願處理這樣的事情，那從最開始你就別約她好了。

ncial Behavior

6.理財習慣

Along with her employment status, you should get some clue about how she treats her money. The old adages about diamonds being a girl's best friend and girls preferring to shop over anything else may seem cute; however, this kind of behavior can sink your relationship before it even begins if the girl you like is irresponsible with money. Alternatively, if she seems financially prudent and saves her money well, you can take this as a sign that she would do her part to safeguard any finances that you build together as a couple. As unthinkable as it may seem now, you should pay attention to her financial behavior before or shortly asking her out on a date.

除了關注她的就業狀況外，你還應當知道些她理財的情況。有句話說得老好啊：鑽石恆久遠，女生好閨蜜。愛逛街的女孩子最可愛，但如果你喜歡的姑娘都不對毛爺爺負責，這類行爲會早早地掐掉你們的愛芽。另一種就是，如果她看起來挺會打理資產的話，你可以看作是她會爲守護雙方共同財產儘自己一份力的信號。雖然現在這看起來難以置信,但赴約前你就得注意下她的理財習慣，或者在約會當中稍稍試問下這件事。

Similarly, many guys think that they are acting macho by spending copious amounts of cash on their dates in the early stages of their relationships. The girl you are dating may be flattered; however, you can take it as a good sign if she insists that you save your money and avoiding spending too much cash on her. On the other hand, if a girl keeps insisting that you spend more and more, seeming to never be satisfied by any amount of goods that you buy, this could indicate that she is using you for your money. This could be the point that you walk away from the date and seek a new partner.

與這個情況類似的是，有些男生啊，剛開始約會時就狂撒大鈔到對象身上，覺得自己特男人。那些和你約會的女孩或許會受寵若驚，但是捏，如果她堅決要你省錢，別老是在她身上使勁花的時候，這就可以視爲一個好的徵兆啦。另一方面，若一個女生總讓你花啊花，看起來永遠不能被你所購之物給滿足的話。這就可以表明她只是看上了你的錢。那麼是時候把她“存檔”然後去找個新伴侶了，

Money should not make the world go round as much as it does, particularly when it comes to building a new romance with a girl that you like. Even so, before you ask her out, you should figure out if she is responsible with money or if she would likely see you as a cash cow to run dry.

金錢不該滲透到世界的各個角落，特別當它涉及戀愛關係的建立的時候。即便如此，在你約她出去之前，就該搞清楚她是不是對毛爺爺負責，或者說，她只是把你當作移動ATM。

nce Goals

5.戀愛目標

In the world of dating today, there are one-night stands and there are romances that are intended to last. Before you ask a girl out, you should know what kind of scenario she is searching for and whether or not you can accommodate her own needs in the relationship. With many ladies today being financially independent, they no longer seek long-term relationships early in their adult lives. They are more interested in having fun and gaining experience before finally settling down for marriage or parenthood.

在當今的約會界中，一夜情和長情羅曼史比比皆是。在你約個妹子出去前，要知道她鍾情何種“劇本”，以及你是否能夠適應她在關係中的索求。當下，隨着許多女性在經濟上越來越獨立，青年女人已不再追尋長久關係。在最終安穩下來結婚生子之前，她們更感興趣的是享樂和汲取戀愛經驗。

If you are interested in having fun and gaining experience as well, then matching up with a girl with that same mindset would work out well for you. However, if you are in it for the long haul and want to build a partnership that is geared more toward marriage and raising a family, you should find out if the woman you are interested in has that same goals in mind. You can ask her directly or take clues from her in everyday conversations that prelude you actually asking her out on a date. At least you can go into the dating relationship with some idea of whether or not you will be together for the foreseeable future.

如果你也對找樂子和汲取戀愛經驗感興趣的話，那去找一個擁有同樣觀念的妹子會更管用些。但是，若你想打戀愛持久戰，想建立一個適合婚姻家庭的關係的話，你應該搞清楚你傾心之人是否也在心裏有着同樣的目標。你可以直截了當地問她，或者從她平日裏的談吐尋找些許線索，這些是你真正該在約會前去了解的東西。至少在戀愛關係中你會清楚一點，你們在一起的話是否能夠看到未來。

It used to be that women would forgo a career and seeking out their own self interests in favor of marriage and motherhood. Today, however, that scenario has changed greatly. Before you ask someone out, you should find out if the girl you like has the same romance goals as you or if you both are incompatible for dating entirely.

曾經，女人會放下事業與自身興趣，去找尋婚姻關係和母親身份。今天，這個局面已然大爲改觀。在你約別人之前，你就該清楚你的伊人是否與你有着同樣的戀愛目標，還是你們兩個連約會都可以免了。

ground and Upbringing

4.個人經歷與家庭教育

Your childhood proves to be a significant factor in the person you are today. Many people bring their childhood experiences, memories, and influences with them into adulthood. Given this fact, you would be well served to tell the girl you like about your background and find out about hers before asking her out on a date. These details can help you both learn if you can create a bond with each other or if your backgrounds are so different that you could never have anything in common in the future.

你的童年經歷對你現在是一個怎麼樣的人有重大影響。許多人都將他們的童年經歷、記憶以及影響帶入了成年期。鑑於這一事實，在約你喜歡的女孩出去前告訴她自己的個人經歷並問問她的經歷,這對你大有好處。這些細節能幫助你們倆搞清楚你們是會彼此有所交集，還是會因爲你們過去經歷太不一樣導致未來也不會有任何共同語言。

For example, if you had a conservative upbringing and were subject to strict discipline as a child, yet the woman you want to ask out had a very liberal background, it could be difficult for you to see eye-to-eye with her on even simple topics like who should pay the restaurant check or whether or not you should open the door for her. Even the smallest of differences can build to major arguments if you both have led very different lives.

例如說，如果你們談到家庭教育方式，並且講到自己童年時受到嚴格的管教，而你想要約會的女性卻有着寬鬆自由的童年，你就可能和她在甚至是很簡單的問題上無法達成一致，再比如吃飯時誰買單或者你是否應該爲她開門。如果你們過着非常不同的生活，即使是一點小小的差異也會讓你們大吵一場。

Further, it could influence how you raise your own children. It is important for people to have some common ground as they build a relationship with each other. By knowing her background and upbringing, you know upfront what challenges could present themselves to you if you pursue a relationship with her.

進一步說，這也會影響到你們撫養自己的孩子的方式。人們在建立關係時很重要的一點就是能有一些相同點。瞭解了她的個人經歷和家庭教育方式，你就能提前知道如果和她在一起會遇到什麼挑戰。

審校：小飛俠 編輯：Freya然 校對：丸子