婚前必問的4個金錢問題
1 What Are Your Assets and Liabilities?
問題一：你的資產和負債狀況如何？
This question is paramount because assets and liabilities are the basic building blocks of the financial life you'll live together. Assets (banks accounts, investments, retirement plans and a house) help you strive for the life you want. The liabilities (a mortgage, credit-card debt, auto loans and leases) will hold you back.
這個問題至關重要，因爲資產負債狀況是夫妻共同財務生活的基石所在。資產（銀行存款、投資理財、退休計劃和持有房產等）能讓你過上自己想要的幸福生活，負債（住房抵押貸款、信用卡債務、汽車貸款和租車費用等）則把你往相反的方向拉。
Your goal is to pinpoint where you are financially as a couple so that you can map out where you want to go together. That could mean determining how much you want to save each month for retirement, or how much you want to put into an account for a new house, a new car or an annual vacation.
你的目標是要準確瞭解雙方共同的財務狀況，這樣才能規劃出兩人今後的奮鬥目標，包括決定每月存多少錢用於退休生活，或者存多少錢來買一棟新房子、一輛新汽車或每年出去度一次假。
It also could mean talking about how you each use debt and the amount of debt you each have -- and mapping out a plan to pay off as quickly as possible the combined debt you will have as a family.
這個話題的交流還包括雙方如何選擇負債，以及負債的具體金額，並擬定一個計劃，在儘可能短的時間裏償還雙方組建家庭後的共同債務。
The best way to approach this: Present each other with a copy of your net-worth statement, a simple list of all your assets and liabilities. And voice no judgments. Mocking a partner's choices will simply lead to future silence.
討論的最佳方式是：給對方一份自己的淨價值表，簡明扼要地列出你的資產和負債項目。記住，不要妄加評判，嘲笑對方的財務選擇會直接切斷雙方未來的交流途徑。
2 What Is Your Money History?
問題二：你在金錢方面有什麼經歷和故事？
What you experienced financially as a child -- how your parents managed their bills, how they talked or yelled about money, what they taught you about saving and spending -- has shaped who you are today.
你童年時在金錢方面的經歷將影響你日後對待金錢的方式，比如你父母如何管理日常開支，在用錢方面如何討論或爭吵，以及如何教你存錢和花錢之道等。
Problems arise in marriage because partners don't always see money from the same perspective. You might abhor debt for anything other than a mortgage, yet your spouse-to-be thinks nothing of putting lunch, groceries and the afternoon Slurpee on a credit card, and then paying the minimum each month and allowing the balance to roll over.
如果夫妻對待金錢的看法不一樣，婚姻就會發生問題。你可能厭惡房貸之外的任何負債，而你未來的配偶卻連吃中飯、買日常用品和飲料都要刷信用卡，然後每個月向銀行支付最低還款額，讓債務越滾越大。
In talking to one another about how you each see money, you will begin to understand one another's money habits. That, in turn, will help you find a common approach for managing money successfully as a couple.
雙方交流金錢觀後，將開始瞭解彼此的用錢習慣，從而有助於找到一個適合雙方情況的金錢管理方式。
Neither of you will -- nor should -- get your way completely. Marriage is about compromise. A better understanding early on of how you each see and use money will give you the tools to find a middle ground you're each happy with when financial discord arises.
夫妻任何一方都不能─也不應該─完全按照自己的習慣來用錢。婚姻就是一種妥協的藝術。你要及早對配偶的金錢觀有一個深入瞭解，這樣才能在雙方出現意見分歧時找到一箇中庸的解決之道。
3 How Should We Divide Financial Duties?
問題三：我們應該如何分配管錢權？
In many marriages, one partner exerts financial dominance over the other, leaving the silenced partner anxious and angry. Other times, one partner shirks financial duties because of disinterest, leaving the other to shoulder the burden. Neither is fair.
在許多婚姻中，夫妻一方想管住另一方的用錢權，後者雖然嘴上不說，但心裏不舒服，甚至很憤怒。另一種情形是，有一方沒興趣管錢，就讓另一方來承擔責任。這兩種方式都不公平。
Couples should determine how to divvy up the various financial obligations that exist. Maybe one takes charge of investing and the other balances the checkbook. Play to each other's strengths. If you're good at challenging bureaucracy, maybe you agree to handle the insurance companies and the medical bills.
夫妻雙方應該商定如何分攤各種財務責任，比如一方負責投資理財，另一方負責日常開支。要發揮各自的長處，如果你擅長對付官僚習氣，也許就可以選擇跟保險公司和醫療報銷機構打交道。
The point is that you both have an obligation to the family's financial well-being, and both spouses need to be aware of the household's financial situation.
關鍵在於，夫妻雙方都應對家庭的財務健康負有責任，都要對家庭的財務狀況有清醒的認識。
If one partner wants to opt out of the daily financial minutiae, that's fine, so long as the other spouse is OK with handling the full obligation. But even then, you need to remain aware of what's going on with the finances so there are no unsavory surprises.
如果夫妻有一方不想被日常開支的小事所糾纏，那也沒關係，只要另一方願意全盤接手就行；但即使如此，你也應該瞭解家庭財務狀況，免得事到臨頭大吃一驚。
4 Do We Combine Accounts or Operate Individually?
問題四：我們應該合着用錢還是各用各的？
This is a divisive issue. Many financial pros argue that operating from individual accounts helps maintain marital peace. Since neither partner knows what happens in the other's account, there's no bickering.
這是一個衆說紛紜的話題。很多財務專家稱，各用各的有助於夫妻和睦相處，因爲彼此不知道對方的資金使用情況，也就無從爭吵。
Maybe. But it's far from perfect. Resentments can emerge if one partner is better at saving and always has money for larger, more meaningful purchases. Moreover, individual accounts mask the family's true financial position, which can hamper the main purpose of marriage: operating as a team.
也許吧，但這麼處理還遠談不上完美。如果一方善於理財，總是有錢買更貴、更有意義的東西，那麼另一方難免會心生怨氣。此外，各用各的容易掩蓋家庭真實的財務狀況，讓婚姻的一個主要目的無從體現：即一起過日子。
If neither of you know how much money is really flowing through the individual accounts, nor how much is being saved and invested, then it's impossible to plan a future together.
如果夫妻雙方都不知道各自的銀行戶頭有多少錢進出，也不知道各自都存了多少錢，做了多少投資，那兩人就不可能一起計劃共同的未來。
That doesn't mean individual accounts can't work. They can. But they require a large degree of openness so that you can both work toward common goals.
當然，這並不是說各用各的就不行，有時候這種方式也管用，但需要夫妻彼此之間開誠佈公，這樣才能奔着共同的目標努力。
Ultimately, all of these questions are about one thing: communication. Learn to talk about money early and often, and you can mitigate the financial tensions that are normal in all marriages.
總之，所有這些問題都涉及兩個字：溝通。學會及早地與對方討論金錢方面的事情，並經常保持這種對話，就能避免所有婚姻中常見的因金錢引起的夫妻爭吵。
