諾貝爾文學經典:《寵兒》第1章Part 1

124 WAS SPITEFUL. Full of a baby's venom. The women in the house knew it and so did thechildren. For years each put up with the spite in his own way, but by 1873 Sethe and her daughterDenver were its only victims. The grandmother, Baby Suggs, was dead, and the sons, Howard andBuglar, had run away by the time they were thirteen years old — as soon as merely looking in amirror shattered it (that was the signal for Buglar); as soon as two tiny hand prints appeared in thecake (that was it for Howard). Neither boy waited to see more; another kettleful of chickpeassmoking in a heap on the floor; soda crackers crumbled and strewn in a line next to the door sill.
Nor did they wait for one of the relief periods: the weeks, months even, when nothing was disturbed. No. Each one fled at once — the moment the house committed what was for him theone insult not to be borne or witnessed a second time. Within two months, in the dead of winter,leaving their grandmother, Baby Suggs; Sethe, their mother; and their little sister, Denver, all bythemselves in the gray and white house on Bluestone Road. It didn't have a number then, becauseCincinnati didn't stretch that far. In fact, Ohio had been calling itself a state only seventy yearswhen first one brother and then the next stuffed quilt packing into his hat, snatched up his shoes,and crept away from the lively spite the house felt for them.
Baby Suggs didn't even raise her head. From her sickbed she heard them go but that wasn't thereason she lay still. It was a wonder to her that her grandsons had taken so long to realize thatevery house wasn't like the one on Bluestone Road. Suspended between the nastiness of life andthe meanness of the dead, she couldn't get interested in leaving life or living it, let alone the frightof two creeping-off boys. Her past had been like her present — intolerable — and since she knewdeath was anything but forgetfulness, she used the little energy left her for pondering color.
"Bring a little lavender in, if you got any. Pink, if you don't."And Sethe would oblige her with anything from fabric to her own tongue. Winter in Ohio wasespecially rough if you had an appetite for color. Sky provided the only drama, and counting on aCincinnati horizon for life's principal joy was reckless indeed. So Sethe and the girl Denver didwhat they could, and what the house permitted, for her. Together they waged a perfunctory battleagainst the outrageous behavior of that place; against turned-over slop jars, smacks on the behind,and gusts of sour air. For they understood the source of the outrage as well as they knew the sourceof light.
Baby Suggs died shortly after the brothers left, with no interest whatsoever in their leave-taking orhers, and right afterward Sethe and Denver decided to end the persecution by calling forth theghost that tried them so. Perhaps a conversation, they thought, an exchange of views or somethingwould help. So they held hands and said, "Come on. Come on. You may as well just come on."The sideboard took a step forward but nothing else did.
"Grandma Baby must be stopping it," said Denver. She was ten and still mad at Baby Suggs fordying.
Sethe opened her eyes. "I doubt that," she said.

124號惡意充斥。充斥着一個嬰兒的怨毒。房子裏的女人們清楚，孩子們也清楚。多年以來，每個人都以各自的方式忍受着這惡意，可是到了1873年，塞絲和女兒丹芙成了它僅存的受害者。祖母貝比·薩格斯已經去世，兩個兒子，霍華德和巴格勒，在他們十三歲那年離家出走了———當時，鏡子一照就碎（那是讓巴格勒逃跑的信號）；蛋糕上出現了兩個小手印（這個則馬上把霍華德逼出了家門）。兩個男孩誰也沒有等着往下看：又有一鍋鷹嘴豆堆在地板上冒着熱氣；蘇打餅乾被捻成碎末，沿門檻撒成一道線。

他們也沒有再等一個間歇期，幾個星期、甚至幾個月的風平浪靜。沒有。他們當即逃之夭夭———就在這座凶宅向他們分別施以不能再次忍受和目睹的侮辱的時刻。在兩個月之內，在殘冬，相繼離開他們的祖母貝比·薩格斯，母親塞絲，還有小妹妹丹芙，把她們留在藍石路上這所灰白兩色的房子裏。當時它還沒有門牌號，因爲辛辛那提還沒擴展到那兒呢。事實上，當兄弟倆一個接一個地把被子裏的棉絮塞進帽子、抓起鞋子，偷偷逃離這所房子用來試探他們的活生生的惡意時，俄亥俄獨立成州也不過七十年光景。
貝比·薩格斯連頭都沒擡。她是在病榻上聽見他們離去的，但這並非她躺着一動不動的緣故。對她來說，孫子們花了這麼長時間才認識到藍石路上這所房子的與衆不同，倒真是不可思議。懸在生活的齷齪與死者的刻毒之間，她對生或死都提不起興致，更不用說兩個出逃的孩子的恐懼心理了。她的過去跟她的現在一樣———難以忍受。既然她認識到死亡偏偏不是遺忘，她便用殘餘的一點精力來玩味色彩。
“給我來點兒淡紫，要是你有的話。要是沒有，就粉紅吧。”塞絲就用一切來滿足她，從布料到自己的舌頭。如果你對色彩有所奢望，那麼俄亥俄的冬天就尤其不堪忍受。只有天空有戲可唱，要把辛辛那提的地平線算作生活的主要樂趣，那簡直是亂彈琴。於是，塞絲和女兒丹芙爲她做了她們力所能及，而且爲房子所允許的一切。她們一起針對那裏的暴行進行了一場敷衍塞責的鬥爭；同倒扣的泔水桶、屁股上挨的巴掌，以及陣陣的酸氣作鬥爭。因爲她們就像知道光的來源一樣明曉這些暴行的來源。
兄弟倆出走不久，貝比·薩格斯就去世了，無論對他們的還是她自己的離去都興味索然。隨即，塞絲和丹芙決定召喚那個百般折磨她們的鬼魂，以結束這場迫害。也許來一次對話、交換一下看法什麼的會管用，她們想。於是她們手拉着手，說道：“來吧。來吧。你乾脆出來吧。”碗櫃向前進了一步，可是別的東西都沒動。
“肯定是貝比奶奶在攔它。”丹芙說。她十歲了，仍然在爲貝比·薩格斯的去世而生她的氣。
塞絲睜開眼睛。“我不信。”她說。