諾貝爾文學經典:《寵兒》第14章Part8

So Stamp Paiddid not tell him how she flew, snatching up her children like a hawk on the wing; how her facebeaked, how her hands worked like claws, how she collected them every which way: one on hershoulder, one under her arm, one by the hand, the other shouted forward into the woodshed filledwith just sunlight and shavings now because there wasn't any wood. The party had used it all,which is why he was chopping some. Nothing was in that shed, he knew, having been there earlythat morning. Nothing but sunlight. Sunlight, shavings, a shovel. The ax he himself took out. Nothing else was in there except the shovel — and of course the saw. "You forgetting I knew herbefore," Paul D was saying. "Back in Kentucky. When she was a girl. I didn't just make heracquaintance a few months ago. I been knowing her a long time. And I can tell you for sure: thisain't her mouth. May look like it, but it ain't." So Stamp Paid didn't say it all. Instead he took abreath and leaned toward the mouth that was not hers and slowly readout the words Paul Dcouldn't. And when he finished, Paul D said with a vigor fresher than the first time, "I'm sorry,Stamp. It's a mistake somewhere 'cause that ain't her mouth."Stamp looked into Paul D's eyes and the sweet conviction in them almost made him wonder if ithad happened at all, eighteen years ago, that while he and Baby Suggs were looking the wrongway, a pretty little slavegirl had recognized a hat, and split to the woodshed to kill her children.
"SHE WAS crawling already when I got here. One week, less, and the baby who was sitting upand turning over when I put her on the wagon was crawling already. Devil of a time keeping heroff the stairs. Nowadays babies get up and walk soon's you drop em, but twenty years ago when Iwas a girl, babies stayed babies longer. Howard didn't pick up his own head till he was ninemonths. Baby Suggs said it was the food, you know. If you ain't got nothing but milk to give em,well they don't do things so quick. Milk was all I ever had. I thought teeth meant they was ready tochew. Wasn't nobody to ask. Mrs. Garner never had no children and we was the only womenthere."She was spinning. Round and round the room. Past the jelly cupboard, past the window, past thefront door, another window, the sideboard, the keeping-room door, the dry sink, the stove — backto the jelly cupboard. Paul D sat at the table watching her drift into view then disappear behind hisback, turning like a slow but steady wheel. Sometimes she crossed her hands behind her back. Other times she held her ears, covered her mouth or folded her arms across her breasts. Once in a while she rubbed her hips as she turned, but the wheel never stopped.

所以斯坦普·沛德沒有告訴他她怎樣飛起來，像翱翔的老鷹一樣掠走她自己的孩子們；她的臉上怎樣長出了喙，她的手怎樣像爪子一樣動作，她怎樣將他們一個個抓牢：一個扛在肩上，一個夾在腋下，一個用手拎着，另一個則被她一路吼着，進了滿是陽光、由於沒有木頭而只剩下木屑的木棚屋。木頭都被宴會用光了，所以那時他纔在劈劈柴。棚屋裏什麼也沒有，他知道，那天一早他去過了。只有陽光。陽光，木屑，一把鐵鍬。斧子是他自己帶來的。那裏除了鐵鍬什麼也沒有——當然，有鋸子。"你忘了我從前就認識她，"保羅·D說道，"在肯塔基那會兒。她還是個小姑娘哪。我可不是幾個月前才認識她的。我認識她好久了。我敢向你保證：這不是她的嘴。可能看着像，可這不是。"所以斯坦普·沛德沒有全說出來。他就吸了一口氣，湊近那張不是她的嘴的嘴，慢慢讀出那些保羅·D不認識的字。他念完之後，保羅·D以一種比第一次更莽撞的魄力說道："對不起，斯坦普。哪兒出了岔子，因爲那不是她的嘴。"斯坦普望着保羅·D的眼睛，眼睛裏面那甜蜜的堅信幾乎使他懷疑一切是否發生過，在十八年前，正當他和貝比·薩格斯看錯了方向的時候，一個漂亮的小女奴認出了一頂帽子，然後衝向木棚屋去殺她的孩子們。
"我到這裏的時候她都會爬了。我把她放在大車上時，她還只會坐着和翻身，一個星期不見，那小寶貝已經會爬了。不讓她上樓梯可真費了牛勁。如今的娃娃一落地就會站、會走路了，可二十年前我是個姑娘的時候，娃娃們好長時間還不能呢。霍華德生下來九個月沒能擡起頭來。貝比·薩格斯說是吃的問題，你知道。要是你除了奶水再沒什麼喂他們，那他們就不能太快開始做事情。我從來都只有奶水。我以爲長了牙他們纔可以嚼東西呢。沒人可以打聽。加納太太從沒生過孩子，可那個地方只有我倆是女人。" 她在轉圈。一圈又一圈，在屋裏繞着。繞過果醬櫃，繞過窗戶，繞過前門，另一扇窗戶，碗櫃，起居室門，乾燥的水池子，爐子——又繞回果醬櫃。保羅·D坐在桌旁，看着她轉到眼前又轉到背後，像個緩慢而穩定的輪子一樣轉動着。有時她把手背在背後。要不就抓耳朵、捂嘴，或者在胸前抱起雙臂。她一邊轉，一邊不時地揉揉屁股，可是輪子一直沒停。